Fringe Festival and the Effing 51 Bus

I’m ready to kill. I practically ran all the way to Mainline Theatre because the effing 51 bus took an hour and I have to walk/run many blocks. I made it. Half way through the play I’m choking because of the dust in this delightful old theatre. And I’m trying so hard not to cough and disturb the wonderful actors which only makes me cough more. I finally calm down. The show “Enough Already” is excellent! I need to pee desperately but I refuse to use the bathroom at Mainline Theatre. I have to walk another 20 minutes to the metro because St-Laurent street is closed to buses due to the week-long Fringe Festival. I decide to get the 102 bus because I’m sick of the 51 (I practically live on the 51). I wait 10 minutes and then the 102 bus driver comes over and says we have to wait for the next bus (1/2 hour) because something is wrong with the engine. ¬†One lady starts bitching at the bus driver: “You saw us standing here for ten minutes while you were talking on the phone! ” “Je ne comprend pas madame. Est ce que il y a quelqu’un ici qui parle Francais?” I’m bilingual but I don’t have time for this argument. I go back to the metro, explain the situation to the guy in the window who shrugs his shoulders. I don’t have time or energy to create a scene (and my bladder is screaming) so I use another ticket to go to Snowdon to get the effing 51 bus.

As I wait for the metro I realize I could have saved myself $3.25 by taking the 105 bus and transferring to the effing 51 but my anger and my bladder made me witless. So witless that as soon as I get on the metro I realize I’m going in the wrong direction! I correct the situation at the next stop, get to Snowdon and the wonderful effing 51 bus is waiting for me. Half an hour later I’m home and grateful I survived another theatre experience. Now I must stop socializing, stay home and finish writing my own play.


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